Highschool, College, University and Now

Here’s the thing.. I like my school years. I like doing well, and I don’t mind doing not so well. In school, I know there’s always tomorrow and I can make up for it then.

Primary School was fun, it was the first time I felt that I was different from my peers. I made amazing lifelong friends who I still keep in touch with. Some I don’t say hi to when I bump into them, I don’t really know why. Some I feel sorry for because they were all glory back then but now… hmm.

Highschool was fun! I didn’t do so well during PMB. Form 3 was pretty boring I recall. Not allowed to do anything. In retrospect, everyone was under stress and pressure, especially the teachers. I believe Form 3 was my laziest year. It was also my first year without Ugama school, so my friend circle narrowed down to half. 😦 That was quite sad. Upper secondary was better, and fun and somewhat easy! I was happy to be involved in many many ECAs, that built up my confidence a lot. In the end though I love my school, I knew I’ve taken all that I could from it. I was pretty psyched up to leave the school, to move on to something new.

New it was! I knew absolutely no one in college. Daunting of course since I was popular in highschool. Here I had no friends! So had to make new ones and I’m glad I did! I have awesome friends. College was the first time also I didn’t have to do Maths! And this was where I learnt to develop my opinions and speak them outloud. I found out that if you put your mind towards something, it will happen. I met awesome teachers, who didn’t necessarily taught very well, because at this level, with my kind of subjects, you need to teach yourself and you need to start thinking on your own lonesome. But they’re awesome because I learnt the single most important lesson: EVERYONE has a story.

Though I learnt how to speak my mind in college, University was the first time those opinions became valued, and this was the first time those opinions developed into more than just words, they became actions. I was very inspired during my Uni time that I had so many random ideas which culminated into this blog. I felt an awakening.

However, towards the end of University life, I felt somewhat jaded, and ordinary. I didn’t feel so challenged and despised what I was doing somewhat. I was really feeling trapped like I was stuck in a rut. 😦 In retrospect, I should’ve done reassessment then and did something about it, but instead plowed on. Big mistake. I was trying to make other people happy and in the process lost myself. I’m paying for it now.

I am grateful that I found SSEAYP. The things I did and the people I met then turned me around! Found myself again and a whole lot more! I kinda promised from then on to be true to myself and never do anything for other people if it makes me miserable.

Some soulsearching months became a year and now, I hapilly live this weird freelancing life that I really don’t know how to explain to people when they ask me what I do.

I’ve had several jobs over the past year, and I’ve found a passion I hope to make a living out of. I believe it’s time for the next stage.

Mums the word for now. I don’t wanna jinx it. Hehe. But I have determination. I want this.

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