How to make new friends

After work just now, I was driving around in my car, and came across an excellent program on Kristal FM, hosted by DJ Dean and Boboy. It was one of those double DJ programs, done in English, and listeners are welcome to text them on their little text line.

Anyway, what I loved about tonight’s show was the topic: How do you make new friends? (May not be the exact words, but it was something to that effect) But basically the show, and the responses from the listeners were so interesting that I actually drove 40 km/h just so I don’t arrive to my destination too fast. Hehe.

Being inspired, here it is, the things I did that actually lead me to new friends.

1. Being generous with smiles:

I think smiling a lot affects the way you are in many ways than just complexion. I think it affects your mood, and the way you choose to look at the world. Somehow, if I see and greet the world with a smiling face, the big bad world is friendlier to me.

2. Blogging

Of course they first started out as readers, but after a while of reading your heart poured into words, your readers will soon feel a bond with you. Sometimes you don’t even realise that what you’ve written down will bring comfort to someone who so badly need to relate on whatever issues. Whatever it is, you reached out, and whether you communicate via comments, Facebook, email, or instant messenger, you have just gained a friend. 🙂

3. Taking up part-time jobs

There is something very satisfying about having a workplace where you not only address your workmates as colleagues, but as actual friends. Another idea is to get attached somewhere as part of gaining experience before you embark on the world of work. You may do a short internship stint or anything like that. It will most definitely gain you many many friends.

4. Do things you don’t normally do

Of course, you don’t have to be too adventurous and start bungee jumping or something crazy like that. But if you’re invited by a group of people to join in something, like say, coffee with someone you have never met, Paintball in Miri, or maybe a roadtrip around Borneo, just say yes! You’ll be surprised with the lasting friendship you gain from these little trips.

5. Joining in local events

I love treasure hunts. It’s amazing how many friends you get by swapping your answers! Not to mention how it gets your brain churning and turning.

6. Joining in youth programs

Like the SSEAYP program. Or any other youth programs offered by the Department of Youth and Sports. Not only you gain friends, you get a chance to build character and discover more things about yourself.

7. Volunteer

Many projects under JAPEM, for example, are forced to idle because there are not enough volunteers to help carry them out. You may be asked to do simple clerical jobs, provide relief for victims of natural disaster, or help mentor kids that just completed rehabilitation programs. Not only JAPEM, if you’re a student at UBD, volunteer to be part of events that your faculty is hosting. Just keep your eyes open on the noticeboard. Whatever it is, you can make many friends, network and do good while you’re at it.

8. Join classes

Whether it’s for learning make-up, belly dancing, cooking class, sewing class, yoga, or just simple aerobics in a gym, work that smile, be yourself and the rest will take care of itself.

9. Keeping an open mind

There are, of course, many people out there that do not fit your idea of an ideal friend. Whether because you do not share the same tastes in music, or whether he or she is not as fashionable as you (or too fashionable it makes you uncomfortable) it is important to know that one attribute, especially if it is physical, does not define a person.

Remember, everyone has layers. No matter how different a person is, if I learnt anything last year, is that you should accept those differences and accentuate on the common grounds.

I could never stress this enough: never judge a book by its cover. Or you’d lose out on a LOT!

10.  Be yourself.

You can’t possibly be any weirder than me, and even I make friends. Hehe. Just be yourself, really.

8 thoughts on “How to make new friends

  1. Maurina-san, ogenki desu ka?

    I saw you from a distance once in Red Canopy Foodcourt @ Kiulap Plaza Hotel. It did cross my mind then to say hi & bye (as a simple gesture of friendship) but you were with your bf then. So maybe if or when we cross SSEAYP paths in the future, I will give my Salam of friendship to you, Insya Allah. All the best, Ms M! 🙂


  2. 😀 Hi PLK!!! Please do feel free to say hi no matter who I’m with next time. Hehehe. I welcome all new friends especially those who advocate Peace, Love and most importantly Kindness! Thank you for visiting T&R. 🙂


  3. there is this other thing that you do, which i think really makes people’s say nice things to random people and buat durang smile..haha..

    and for some reason, the two instances i noticed u doing this were both hair-related and to salespersons (the tinsel-haired lady in hua ho kiulap and the girl with highlights in ego). hmmm…now that i think of it, ada ulterior motive kah ni? haha


  4. hahahaha! mana ada ulterior motive. i just think that people like salesladies don’t get enough credit despite the work they do.

    hmm… although i always make sure that i am extra nice to:

    – people who clean public toilets (can u imagine how fucking disgusting it is to clean after peoples shit? be nice to these people!)
    – anyone who is working in the maintenance industry: cleaning, repairing, etc.
    – security guards (it’s a lonely job i’d imagine)
    – waitresses (standing all day ngalih)

    i think life is hard. people should just be nice to each other!!!!


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